December, 1998
Top 10 Reasons Why: They’re Not Wearing Their Retainers (Humor)
Originally published: September, 1996
Top 10 Reasons Why “They’re Not Wearing Their Retainers”:
10. My teacher told me not to wear it.
9. The dog ate it.
8. My boyfriend doesn’t like it.
7. I can’t breathe with it in.
6. I left it at Mickey D’s, Burger King, Wendy’s…
5. It broke, so I couldn’t wear it.
4. Someone stole it.
3. I was sick and it fell in the toilet.
2. I tried to boil it to get it clean.
and the best answer of all:
1. It didn’t fit anymore so I quit wearing it.
